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Safe Haven

September 16, 2009

I just realized, as I started to rant on my Facebook page earlier, that it seems like my only safe haven is my blog. Very few people know about it, and most of you, my loyal readership, have not yet met me in real life.

So I feel okay in the fact that I can tell you all how completely annoyed with my family I am. I have been reminded, on more than a few occasions in the past month, why I chose to make a home no less than 500 miles away.

Now, I can respect that they all have lives and at times, I can be a complete and total disruption, but I help out and do what I can. Or I try. But there are days like today that I don’t feel like the deal goes both ways.

Dear sister, when I ask you if you and your husband would be willing to watch my ONE kid for 8 hours so I can go on a date with my new boyfriend, please just say yes, rather than telling me that you don’t think you could emotionally handle the burden. And please don’t talk to me about how as parents, we never really get a break. We all deserve one, even me. Should I remind you that I single-handedly watched your TWO kids and my own for four days three weeks ago and wanted to kill myself at the end of it? I’m not asking much.

Mom, Dad, I realize that I am living in your house essentially rent free, which is more than fair and generous. However, the reality is that I am living in a tiny little bedroom, which I share with a three year old and half a retail store. I probably have less than 100 square feet to call my own. So please don’t make me feel bad when I want to hog the one TV in the house that has a DVR on it two nights a week. It’s all I’ve got.

And when I want to get away for a weekend, please understand that it’s not because I can afford to, it’s really just for my sanity and your life.



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