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If you really knew the half of it

July 9, 2007

I’m tempted to blog about how hard things have been this past week — how I spent an hour in the middle of the day bawling my eyes out last Tuesday, and the only reason I didn’t leave work to spend the rest of the day doing more of the same because another lady was in surgery with her son and I needed to stay at work. I want to talk about how it took all I had yesterday not to lose it in the middle of a church picnic. It would feel great to bitch about how badly I want to see my therapist, but can’t afford it. But I think that it would get me going again when today was the first time I genuinely felt like laughing in almost a week. Maybe I’ll get there soon.

In the meantime…

My baby brother turned 21 today. I think him turning 21 was more devastating to me than when my sister did. My mom says it’s because I’m so much older than he, but I think it’s just realizing that my whole family is grown-ups adults now. We can all go out for a drink and who knows, I might be dancing on a bar with my brother in a few months, like I did with my sister when she turned 21. Oh wait, I wasn’t supposed to ever mention that again.

I have to say that one of my favorite memories of growing up with my brother was when he was 3. We were in Las Cruces, NM, for one of my dad’s business trips. It just so happened that the hotel we were staying at was also hosting the group of teenagers from our town’s FFA that same weekend. As the whole gang was playing in the pool, my brother jumped out, ran to the bush on the side of the pool, whipped his pants down and took a whiz. All of the pool antics paused for a moment as everyone watched this hick kid taking a leak on the edge of the cement pond. My mom was mortified, my dad shook his head, and my brother pulled up his shorts and jumped back in the pool as though what he had done was completely normal.

Seeing as he now towers 1/2 a foot over me, he would probably kick my butt to know that I just shared that story with the world. I will wait for my noogie, but in the mean time, happy birthday, bro. I love you.

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